Fate of Friendship

 

We don’t meet people by accident. They are meant to cross our path for a reason.

Never judge someone by their physical beauty. I often hear this from several people who at first they were strangers and then turned into my best friends. During my time as a volunteer, I got to know a lot of people. I got a lot of experience.

Like this story, at that time I knew him because he sent me a DM. I asked him what brought him there. He was engaged and his parents did the arranged marriage for him. He said that in a few months he would be getting married. I asked him, if he was engaged, then why he felt lonely. Doesn't he now have a fiancé that they should both learn to know each other before their wedding?

He told me actually he wasn't comfortable with any of that. He also felt that he did not like the girl his parents chose. It's just that because his parents were forcing him and he didn't want to hurt his parents, he was forced to do the arranged marriage.

We talked a few days and I could see that this guy has a childish nature and he wants someone who understands him. I advise him, if he doesn't feel comfortable, don't do things he doesn't want to do especially that is marriage.

Marriage is not something that is easy. Not only love is needed but a great responsibility and mature readiness. Marriage is not dating. If dating, then if the couple breaks up then both of them can delete contact, throw things away from each other and don't know each other anymore, while marriage is different. There are many things at stake and many things to consider if you want to separate from your partner, especially if there are already kids between them.

This guy said he would think about my advice and I didn't think about it anymore. We still talk sometimes but not intensely. He only reaches out to me when he needs advice. Until a few months later he stopped contacting me.

At first I thought that maybe he was married because as I recall at that time it was the deadline for him to get married so maybe now he is happy.

Until one time he reached me again. And at that moment to be honest I was surprised, I didn't think he would look for me again. When we spoke again, he sounded very sad and depressed. Apparently the engagement was cancelled and he didn't marry the girl. I won't mention the reason why they didn't get married even though I know the reason.

When he was at his lowest point, he reached for me again because he thought I could understand him and he felt comfortable sharing it with me. He says I can also calm him down. I actually only give support and encouragement so that he doesn't give up and don't be sad just because his wedding plans failed.

Short story, he told me he would find a new job outside his country and his mother would find another girl for him. I suggested to him to tell his mom about the criteria for the girl to choose if his mother wanted him to marry and be happy on his marriage.

At first he was surprised, he asked me, how I can know what he wanted. I just told him that it was because I knew him deeply. I can understand him and I want him to be happy in his life.

I don't really know what's going on, it's just that it's easy for me to sense someone especially if I focus on that person. I can know their nature and desires if I really want to do it and I intend to.

I once asked someone why that person always came back to me for advice. That person answer is simple, according to that person I understand people, I understand what someone wants and they are comfortable to talk and share about their burdens with me.

This guy initially thought I was trans and he never thought that he would cross paths with someone like me. According to him, I am different. To this day we still communicate and whenever he needs help, I am always there for him.

I'm not someone who can offer help to anyone. For me to be able to do that requires huge effort and sincerity to do that. If I can help then I don't need to say but will show to them through my actions that I sincerely want to help them.

Sometimes life is strange, destiny is also sometimes strange. Everything that has been planned as perfectly as possible can sometimes still fail. I know I can't be of much help. But knowing that there are people who need my help to listen to their burdens, it honestly makes me happy.

So far, everyone in my real life always thinks I'm useless, I always do stupid things that end in mistakes. I didn't expect that there were people out there who actually needed me and didn't think of me as a useless person.

 

PS : Thank you S, you have given me permission to share our story. Will treat mango flavor Liqua for you