Pregnancy experience

 

Pregnancy is something that is often awaited by married couples. So am I. Having children is an infinite gift given from God to us. I really like taking care of babies. Maybe it's because since childhood I always take care of my siblings, making me like babies and kids.

Surprisingly they were easy to get close to me. Even though they're not my children and it might be our first meeting, but somehow it's always easy for me to get close to them.

So when I got married, my partner and I did not delay the time to have children. At that time I was still working and I was very young. I’m still immature and I'm still very inexperienced. My mindset was too simple, I like babies and kids so I wanted to experience pregnancy and have my own child.

My pregnancy was not something easy for me to experience at that time. Not because of nausea in the morning or because my body is weak. The worst thing was that my emotions were suddenly much more unstable. I can barely control my emotions.

Everything also does not go smoothly because it turns out that one thing affects other things. I still had to adjust to my partner because at that time we still newlywed and then with my pregnancy things started to get a lot more complicated.

It was my first pregnancy and I didn't know who to talk to. Even though there are many people around me, it's hard for me to share my burden because I hide everything from them and they always think that I can always solve my own problems.

Until finally in the fourth month of my pregnancy, I experienced heavy bleeding that made me have to be rushed to the hospital. Although I was often afraid to face my own problems but that was the first time I felt a tremendous fear. When the obstetrician told me that if by tomorrow morning I was still bleeding then I would lose my baby.

To this day whenever I remember that incident, I still get goosebumps and it really traumatized me. I remember all night praying while stroking my tummy, hoping that God would hear my prayer and would save my baby.

I didn't sleep all night and was terrified all night thinking about what would happen tomorrow. When the morning miracle happened, suddenly the bleeding subsided and until the obstetrician came, she did not believe that the bleeding was less because there was little chance for my baby to survive.

I was hospitalized for a week. Before I was discharged from the hospital the doctor advised me that I could not work too hard and had to relieve the stress in my mind because according to the obstetrician, my pregnancy was problematic and weak. My blood pressure was high and it also caused concern for the obstetrician about my pregnancy.

Knowing all that, I knew I had to choose between my career or my baby. I decided to resign from my job and become a full-time housewife. I knew that I had to sacrifice something and after experiencing the incident, I knew I didn't want to lose my baby. I will definitely choose my baby over my job.

To distract myself, I started doing my old habits, reading books, magazines and looking for info about pregnancy and babies. I spend my time doing that and doing my duty as a housewife. I decided not to leave the house too often and lay down more so that I wouldn't bleed again just like the incident at that time.

At that time as a woman of course I wanted my delivery to be normal so that I could feel like a complete woman. But it turned out not all that easy. When it came time for me to give birth, my water did not break but the contractions came and went with a force that I really couldn't stand. It was my first pregnancy and I honestly didn't know what to do at the time.

I decided to come to the hospital even though it was the middle of the night. I can't stand the pain anymore. When I got there, the doctor said that I still had to wait because he and I still had the belief that I would be able to give birth naturally.

I spent the next day in the hospital with increasing pain. My blood pressure was rising and I was increasingly unable to think properly. I'm almost crazy.

One day passed and I couldn't stand the excruciating pain in the end I asked the doctor if there was another way because I was sure I couldn't take the pain anymore. The doctor gave me the option of induction or delivery by cesarean (SC). I asked him if I chose induction what would happen next. He predicts that if the induction doesn't work, the last method is SC.

By then my blood pressure was still high and since the contractions had been going on for more than two days, I didn't want to waste any more time. I decided to request a cesarean section. I didn't want to try again and I didn't want to have a normal delivery experience because at that moment the most important thing and all that was on my mind was that my baby could be delivered safely.

My baby was born on the third day I was in the hospital by caesarean section. I got to see my baby one day after I had a C-section. All the suffering disappeared the first time I held my son. Seeing he sleeping and helpless, I forgot all the pain I had felt during my pregnancy.

At that time what was on my mind was to recover quickly. After that SC, my recovery was the challenge and the hardest part for me. I had to do it alone because at that time my partner wasn't there because he had to work and I had to do everything alone.

I had to learn to walk, change clothes, learn to breastfeed and learn to do everything without anyone's help except the nurse at the hospital who always supported me and encouraged me. Three days later I was discharged from the hospital.

At that time I thought everything was over there. I imagined that I would be with my baby, taking care of him, thinking about all that made me happy. But sometimes things don't go that smoothly. Although I still have to face another problem, the healing of my stitches, which apparently took long time than normal people, my patience was really tested at that time.

At that time I wasn't even twenty. Experiencing all of that in my youth, it was really a very valuable life experience for me. In the nine months I really experienced the ups and downs of newlywed life which turned out to be quite a shock for me because I had to adjust myself to my partner and added that I was pregnant at the time. All in all it was truly an amazing experience.

My experience giving birth also taught me a lot of valuable lessons. Many things that I experienced, I sacrificed and I fought for my pregnancy at that time. But whatever it is, seeing my baby's face, seeing him fall asleep and born perfectly, it really makes me happy. No happiness can beat that.